About
“That will never happen to me.” Famous last words.
Hello, and welcome to The Men Oh Pause. Let me take you back to my twenties.
I would be in a meeting, or on a bus, or at a family party, and there she would be: a woman of a certain age, fanning herself with whatever she could find. A menu. A newspaper. Her hand. Bright red, a little flustered, peeling off a cardigan in the middle of December. And I would think, oh God, what is happening to her? Followed very quickly by: well, that will never happen to me.
In my thirties I was even more sure. I was fit. I exercised. I ate my greens. I had a plan for everything, so obviously I would find a way around this too.
Then it hit me like a ton of bricks.
The hot flushes. The brain fog. Walking to the garage three times and still not knowing why. Opening every window in the house in the middle of winter while everyone else reached for a blanket. All those women I used to stare at? I owe every one of them an apology, and possibly a fan.
Nobody escapes it. So why does nobody talk about it?
Here is what I have learned. Perimenopause is not something you can out-run, out-eat or out-plan. It comes for all of us, the fit ones, the organised ones, the ones who were absolutely sure it would never happen to them.
And yet we whisper about it. We hide the fan. We make excuses for the brain fog. We sit in meetings sweating quietly and say nothing, because it still feels like something to be embarrassed about.
I think that needs to change. So this is a place to say it out loud:
- “I have brain fog today.”
- “I am going through perimenopause.”
- “I am having a hot flush, can we open a window?”
No apologies, no awkward silence. Just a nod, an open window, and maybe a laugh. That is the world I want, and The Men Oh Pause is my little corner of it.
What you will find here
- Stories that are funny because they are true
- The real science in plain English, checked against NHS guidance
- Free tools and planners to spot your patterns and take them to your GP
- Things that genuinely helped me, honestly reviewed
I am not a doctor, and nothing here replaces one. I will always point you back to your GP or pharmacist for medical decisions. But I can promise you this: you are not going mad, you are not alone, and you never have to hide the fan again.